[four_fifth]
1) Friendly Fire – Is!
2) Spiteful Spirit is Necro’s way of telling you to slow down
3) If the build is stupid but it works, it won’t work next map
4) Try to look healed, the enemy may be low on energy and not want to waste a spell on you.
5) If at first you don’t succeed, call Crysania
6) If you are forward of the monk’s aggro circle, healing spells will fall short.
7) Never share a vanquishing group with anyone braver than yourself.
8) If your attack is going really well, the roving patrol is about to join you.
9) No battle goes perfect after the first called target
10) The easy way requires builds you didn’t bring.
11) Shadow Step into enemy territory means out of friendly territory.
12) If you’re low on health and energy, but not enemies – welcome to combat.
13) Never draw fire, -7 degen sucks.
14) Incoming fire has the right of way. So does incoming lightning, and earth…
15) If they are in casting range, so are you.
16) Olias will die as soon as you run out of energy.
17) Any build you bring can get you killed. Not every build you bring can keep you alive.
18) Raise the party’s defense enough and no one is left to attack.
19) Sniper is only reliable when you don’t need it.
20) Large numbers of “Cry of Frustration” demonstrate truth in advertising.
21) Wiki will only omit the one detail that causes mission failure.
22) Number of Completed Titles denotes successive levels of insanity.
23) The number of enemy cover hexes is always one more than number of hex removal skills you bring.
24) Universal builds aren’t
25) When In doubt, cast everything.
26) The most annoying thing in the world is a blood necro with 60% death penalty.
27) The harder the area, the more you’ll farm it for points.
28) The complexity of a build is inversely proportional to the time you’ll have in battle to use it.
29) Knowledge of what skills to bring is obtained shortly after it’s required.
30) No matter where the boss spawns, it’s not near your portal.
31) For every enchantment, there is an equal and opposite hex.
32) The best builds never make sense when looking at the template list.
33) Those who hesitate get spiked. Those who don’t hesitate get interrupted.
34) Never lead a guild. The officers don’t know what they want to run, but they know what they don’t want to run.
35) Your best skill will always be recharging when the perfect opportunity arises.
36) The brave die the most. They also get more gold drops.
37) Any title that says “legendary” is a badge of sadomasochism.
38) The quiet patch of the map has an underground ambush waiting
39) The Area of Effect of Nuker Skills is one step further than you can run before dying.
40) If you’re set for a spike-ambush, the patrol won’t walk that far.
41) The higher the party Death Penalty, the closer to the objective.
42) Success occurs when you’re just experimenting with builds. Failure occurs when you bring the one you know will work.
43) Always hang near a buddy with less health, it gives the enemy someone else to spike.
44) Nuker spells only come in two sizes, too expensive and too cheap.
45) If you survive the ambush, check your death penalty.
46) High Armor Rating = More Armor Ignoring Skills
47) You have two mortal enemies in combat: the opposing side and monks with no energy
48) Gold drops are ok. Completing the mission without Death Penalty is better.
49) If you can think clearly, know exactly what’s happening, and have total control of a situation in combat then you’re either: dead, or a guild leader.
50) Spirits are the kings of battle. Minions are the queens of battle, very ugly queens…
51) People who don’t make force choke jokes at somewhat regular intervals get force choked.
52) Balreth’s Sniper will reliably work on two occasions: 1) immediately after you cast half your bar on the foe and 2) when the foe only had 50 HP left anyway.
53) Be nice to Dunkoro, he seems to randomly ignore party members in battle.
54) Don’t be afraid of dying, high death counts = better drops, just look at Nyx and Balreth.
55) If your network fails, it will either be: in front of the boss, or trying to switch maps.
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[one_fifth_last]
Story #7
23 Apr 2010
Notes: Many of these still apply today.
References: Guild Wars Experience, and Murphy.
[/one_fifth_last]