[four_fifth]
[Setting: Guild Hall, with Guild Henchmen]
Henchman 1: Did you see that last Guild Battle? I so totally killed that fleeing Kurzick with my Longbow. Who needs [Ebon Vanguard] Sniper when I’m around?
[the group scoffs]
Henchman 2: Whatever. Did you all see me rope a siege turtle and then shoot a [kurzick] Juggernaut in the face?!
[group nods in approval]
Henchman 3: Oh yeah? Our Guild Leader crossed the Southern, Northern, AND Far Shiverpeaks wearing nothing but a loincloth and face paint!
[group silences]
Henchman 4: Dude, lame.
Henchman 5: Yeah man, don’t try to swap war stories with Crysania…
[awkward pause]
Henchman 4: I hope you get force choked.
—
Henchman 1: Hey, have you seen the old guy lately?
Henchman 2: Not in about 5-
Henchman 4: 3, sir!
Henchman 2: -3 Weeks.
Henchman 3: Who haven’t you seen?
Henchman 1: Tim the Enchanter
Henchman 2: too funny, highfive
Henchman 4: all right, quiet down before we get ‘not at your post’ lines.
Henchman 2: highfive again!
Henchman 3: Aren’t you a little short to be a henchman?
[bad puns and highfives abound]
—
Henchman 1: Have you seen Callista?
Henchman 2: Nyx.
Henchman 1: Really?
Henchman 2: Yeah, she’s Nyx now.
Henchman 1: Then why do we only see her during the day?
Henchman 2: Dude, I’m so not going there
Henchman 1: Force choke, I understand
—
Henchman 1: So…Lalandra quit or something?
Henchman 2: Nah, I heard she got injured. Tendonitis or something.
Henchman 3: I’ve never even heard of that, must be a damned good hex spell.
Henchman 1: So, kind of like her arms atrophied?
Henchman 2: I think so.
Henchman 3: That’s kind of funny
Henchmen 1&2: What?!
Henchman 3: Funny. You know. She atrophied, she’s a NECRO.
[brief pause]
Henchmen 1&2: Yeah that is kinda funny actually…
Henchmen 3: we better keep to ourselves on this one.
[the group nods and returns to their duties]
[/four_fifth]
[one_fifth_last]
Story #2
20 Mar 2010
Notes: As of 13 Jan 2012, The common wisdom is still not to swap war stories with Crysania.
References: Guild History, Monty Python, Star Wars
[/one_fifth_last]